Once upon a time there was a homely princess. She was already twenty-one and so considered an old maid. It didn't help that her name was Drucilla. Everyone called her Cilla. Except her wicked stepfather who called her Drucy, or Silly, or just plain Ugly.

Her only real friend was her pet cockroach whom she called Jiminy. (She had a bad memory, too!) Jiminy would entertain her for hours by sitting in fear of being squashed and scuttling around the base of the walls looking for crumbs. The best part about Jiminy was that every time her uglier stepbrother and stepsister, Pog and Mog, came to harass her, as long as Jiminy was on her shoulder, they left her alone.

One day, Jiminy disappeared. Drucilla searched high and low (mostly low... very low) for him. But she finally knew that Pog and Mog had stolen her best friend (as pitiful as that may be) so she knew she had to enlist the aid of the King's detectives!

She went to them and begged for help, but to no avail, so she set out to find her beloved cockroach alone. It was hard for her to be without him, she missed his hard shelled body with the antennae that would tickle her while she tried to sleep. She knew she had to find him soon. She searched the entire castle, but no luck so she set out to find him in the wilds of her father's kingdom. First, she went to the forest and while she was walking she heard this awful "Crunch!"

She looked down, and to her relief, it wasn't Jiminy, just a plain, old, peasant cockroach. The experience so unnerved her that she fled to her father's stables. This is where she discovered that other animals existed, and realized that her cockroach was downright disgusting, but she loved him anyway.

Just then she saw Jiminy in a pile of manure, and she grabbed him and did something she had never done - she kissed him on his sweet. litttle, cockroach head.

Lo and Behold, the cockroach turned into a homely prince and they fell in love and got married.

On their first anniversary, Drucilla gave birth to twins - one boy and one very cute cockroach. (Whose first kiss from her daddy turned her into a cute little girl)

To this day, they have outlawed any form of Raid or cockroach killing!

The end...

The moral of this story is... if you are a homely old maid, don't go around kissing cockroaches or they may end up overrunning your kingdom.