I do NOT collect Pigs!!!
Ode to Piggies
by Heather Morgan
Creeping past my hallway door
Eating grass and wanting more
Waddling along a linoleum floor
Searching searching for piggy lore.
Pellets, veggies, and timothy hay
I'll be wanting more, I'd say,
Let me run around and play
Frightening all the hamsters away.
Piggy, happy squeaking one
Basking, purring in the sun
Soon the victory'll be won.
And the piggy rule begun
A pig is a jolly companion
Boar, sow, barrow, or gilt--
A pig is a pal, who'll boost your morale,
Though mountains may topple and tilt.
When they've blackballed, bamboozled, and burned you,
When they've turned on you, Tory and Whig,
Though you may be thrown over by Tabby and Rover,
You'll never go wrong with a pig, a pig,
You'll never go wrong with a pig.
--Thomas Pynchon, "Gravity's Rainbow"
by Arnold Lobel
There was a sad pig with a tail
Not curly, but straight as a nail.
So he ate simply oodles
Of pretzels and noodles,
Which put a fine twist to his tail.
There was a poor pig on the street.
In the trash he found tidbits to eat.
Though his hot garbage stew
Smelled exactly like glue,
He declared that its taste was a treat.
There was a shy pig by a wall
Who was frightened when guests came to call.
At the sound of their chatter
His shape became flatter,
Until he was not there at all.
There was a small pig who wept tears
When his mother said, "I'll wash your ears."
As she poured on the soap,
He cried, "Oh, how I hope
This won't happen again for ten years!"
What was a Heffalump like?
"It is awfully hard to be b-b-brave," said Piglet, "when you are only a Very Small Animal.
Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.
"Pooh!" he whispered.
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure of you."
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